It was the combination of small things that constantly nagged Pamela as she and her siblings struggled to care for their ailing mother.
Who was going to be able to make the 30-minute drive to mom’s house to help her with her medication? When last did she really take a shower? Is she really eating healthy and regularly?
“Then came the impossible choices.” Said Pamela. “Should I attend my son’s sport event or run an errand for my mom? How can I make such a choice?”
Her mom, Jane, is now 89 years old and receiving care from Jura Home Care.
But for a number of years, Pamela and her siblings were among the countless individuals who provide unpaid care for a friend or loved one.
If Pamela had one piece of advice for those in her place: “Do not wait to get a caregiver to help. The relief of knowing that your mother is taken care of is truly a blessing.” she said. “There was a peace of mind, and I wish I had done it earlier. You always worry about the money, it’s true. But there is no price tag for your own peace of mind or your loved one’s comfort and safety.”
The strain on her and her siblings intensified when her mother turned 72 and had to stop driving.
The once in a blue moon trip turned into more frequent trips. Her mom had to visit the cardiologist every other week due to her pacemaker. Her blood had to be tested and over the years Jane became incontinent and Pamela worried about her hygiene.
And while a half-hour drive may not sound like much, it all added up in time and stress for Pamela. Between her full-time job, her family, church, etc, it was a tough time for the whole family.
Pamela hired Jura Home Care to care for her mom, and help around the house. “This helped me so much.” She said.
“I constantly felt pulled in many different directions before,” Pamela said. “Since then it helps to have help. It is a lifesaver. Even just with the basic things like giving baths or helping with the nappies. I was unable to do these things properly.”
The caregiver is able to approach my mother from a professional point of view, while I at times am too emotionally attached. Too often my emotions prevent me from being able to really provide the care she needs. “When I realized this, I knew it was time that I needed help. Real help.” Pamela said.
“You just can’t do it all.” Pamela said. “Some days are just chaotic and I’m not able to face my mom. But the caregiver is there, everyday.”
“Since I got a caregiver for my mom, my relationship with her began improving. It no longer feels tedious and like a job to visit her, instead I can really connect with her. When I visit on Sundays, I don’t want to be cleaning her bathroom, I want to make her some rooibos tea and sit in the sun with her.”
[Names have been changed to maintain anonymity]